31 Lessons about Life in my 31 years

This has been the most challenging year that I can remember and this was confirmed by Lisa.  It was an emotional rollercoaster filled with lots of experiences that made me grow, reflect, and learn more about myself and life.  It was also a very humbling experience as well.

Here are the 31 life lessons that I’ve learned:

  1. No one is perfect. Love everyone for their flaws and understand in every relationship whether it is your family, friend, or partner, mistakes will happen.
  2. You can’t change people. As Maya Angelou said, “When someone shows you who they are believe them; the first time.”  Growing up, you were more flexible and mold-able, but at this point, don’t expect people to change.  If they do, it will only be temporary.  The only way someone will change is because they have made that decision for themselves, not because someone pushed them.
  3. Everyone struggles. “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about,”- Wendy Mass.  Keep in mind, some people are just better at hiding it than others.
  4. Disagreements will happen. The real test is how you handle the disagreement.
  5. Let go of toxic relationships …and this includes friendships, not just lovers.
  6. People will talk, people will judge, people will change. It’s ok and it’s all a part of life. People will talk about you and you will talk about others.  Some people will say good things, while others will say bad things.
  7. Accept yourself. We are our own harshest critic, as hard as it is, learn to be ok with who you are now.
  8. Being nice doesn’t always pay off. We were taught growing up to be nice to everyone, to kill them with kindness than fight back.  That may have worked as kids, but it does not work as adults.  Being too nice gives the wrong impression such as you are obsessed with the person, fake (No one is that nice), or weak and get taken advantage of.
  9. Being selfish isn’t always a bad thing. Selfish has such a negative connotation, but the older you get the more you realize it is ok to be selfish to an extent.  You don’t have to take care of everyone else, you have needs too.
  10. Understanding a bad year, bad month, bad day doesn’t define your life. Eventually everything will turn around.
  11. Life isn’t fair and it will never be fair. Stop expecting it to. Not everyone was born on the same playing field, but it doesn’t mean that your life cannot be amazing in any case.
  12. You will be rejected multiple times in your life.
  13. Good health is a blessing. Not money or a C-Level job.
  14. Time is valuable. There truly is no price on time.
  15. You don’t need to say “yes” to everything. There is no need to feel obligated to say yes to 10 invitations.  Say no and enjoy doing the things you want to.
  16. Every decision leads to a different outcome, some are positive, some are negative. Learn from the ones that didn’t work out and move on. BUT…don’t forget the lessons the past has taught you.
  17. You want to be carded. Yes, you heard me right.  If you get carded it means you still look young, when you don’t, that’s when you get hit with some reality dust that they can see your wrinkles and white hair.
  18. People always think the grass is greener on the other side. No one’s life is perfect, so before wishing to be in someone else’s shoes, take a step back and look at your life.
  19. Take time to stop and reflect. As simple as it sounds, seriously taking a step back and reflecting on your life, what you want, what the universe is telling you is a game-changer.
  20. Surround yourself with positive things and this includes positive things, positive people, and of course a positive mindset.
  21. Always take care of your beauty.  If you don’t take care of yourself, who else will?
  22. Sleeping until Noon on a weekend isn’t lazy.
  23. Save for retirement today.  We can’t depend on Social Security when we retire, it doesn’t take a lot, but start setting some money aside.
  24. Understand you are replaceable. I deal with this all the time, where people feel like no one at work is better than them or they deserve more.  No, you are a number.
  25. A failure isn’t the end of the world. Failure is how you learn and how you grow.
  26. Life doesn’t come with a plan. I wish it did, but we are all taking wrong turns together on this journey.
  27. Crying is ok once in a while.  I never cried growing up, we were taught crying meant you were weak.  As you grow older, you realize crying is absolutely normal and even therapeutic at times…Just not all the time.
  28. Sometimes you have to play dumb.  No one likes a no it all and no one likes to feel inferior.  The best lesson was from my mom where she told me sometimes you just have to say yes when the person tells you the sky is purple when you clearly can see the sky is blue.
  29. Be different, don’t be the status quo.  Don’t worry about fitting in or trying to be someone else you are not.  As Oscar Wilde said, “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
  30. Take risks.  This is the time to take risks from changing your career, move to a new place, or travel the world.
  31. Enjoy whatever you are doing.  This is a simple motto in life…If you are not enjoying what you are doing, don’t do it.

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