Karen’s Column…Advice for the Loved and Loveless

Money or Time, what matters more?

Don’t we all love ambitious and successful men? But I’ve been asking myself lately at what cost?

Karen knows there have only been maybe 4 guys that I have actually liked and saw things going forward, but the rest received a very nice, it’s been great but I don’t think things should move forward message.

The reason the 4 frogs did not become a prince was because they were all workaholics, which brought up the conversation of the downfalls of dating workaholics. Of course there are some benefits, but overall there are a lot more pitfalls of being attracted to very successful men.

It is such a double-edge sword because as Karen said “If you want a less ambitious guy aka less money, no beamer, he will always be available for you. But it comes with less vacations, chain restaurant food, and non-German vehicles.”

I feel like dating a person like this is similar to being on a see-saw. Your place in their world will always go up or down based on what is on the other side. In many cases, what new business opportunity or deal in on the other side of the see-saw.

As stated by Karen, they have what we are looking for, but they are always working. We also love that they work hard, but hate when they are not available. And that fact is true.   Remember G? He picked me up at the grocery store along with eggs, milk, and bread? The main reason we ended was because of his lack of availability. Every few weeks, he’ll ask if I’m still mad and I’ll ask if he’s still working and the answer is always yes.  One time when he asked me to be understanding and why I was disappearing again, I told him and this was his dramatic response.


D was the last frog. It was someone I really liked, but he had warned me he worked a lot. He owned 3 restaurants, managed one and was opening a fourth. Honestly I do not see him slowing down anytime soon. I remember casually asking if he eventually wanted kids. He said no, but if his future wife wants one, he’ll give it to her. I told him, a baby is not like buying someone a beamer or new house, it’s a two person job.

Men like this will never know when enough is enough. I was watching “Million Dollar Listing: Los Angeles.” Josh is this big hot-shot real estate agent with every tangible thing he could think of and a very beautiful girlfriend. I personally think Heather is beautiful and very nice, but on this season she called off their wedding because he could never make her his priority. He can buy her the biggest ring, car, etc… but it’s not enough. She even told him all she wanted was his attention or else she would leave and he still could not pass up a deal.

Even when they lose the most important person in their life, business will always take priority. Tien made a comment saying that 10 years from now these guys will still be alone and down the road they will look back and they don’t have a loved one, kids, and they’ve lost many of their friends and family along the way.

But as part of figuring out what is really important when looking for someone, it’s crucial to look for a balance. A great partner knows how to balance work and personal items. I’ve said it before, but life is too short to spend it working. You work to have money to enjoy life, but I think a lot of people forget what life really is about. It would be fantastic to have a couple million in the bank, but life is about the people, memories, and enjoying every silly moment. Those silly moments are the ones that you can’t ever recreate, you can always replace things.

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